Destroying a Portal

Raven always knew that she would be used as the portal to bring Trigon to earth. She always knew that she would be the one to cause the 'end of the world'. She knew before the monks of Azarath even told her. She knew because her father told her while she was still in her mother's womb. "You will bring destruction to everything and everyone," he told her. "It is your destiny."

She didn't want to be the one to bring the great demon to destroy them all. She tried to forget about it. She became a hero, joined a team, made friends, but she just could not forget what she was actually born for. Now that Slade had shown up and told her that the day was near she was going to commence her plan, a plan she had come up with when she was ten and had been waiting to use.

Contrary to belief, demons could die, and Raven fully intended to use this to her advantage.

Looking over the roof of the Titan's Tower, she could see the bright lights of the city and the few stars that were shining in the night sky. It was past one in the morning so all the Titans should be asleep by now. "The end of the world is almost here," she said as if reminding herself. "The end of the world is almost here, and I have to try to stop it." Raven put the knife against her throat. She could feel her heart beating faster with each passing second and the cold steel of the knife. Raven's last plan to stop Trigon from coming to earth was to kill herself. If she wasn't alive she couldn't be used as a portal. Could she?

"I have to try," Raven reminded herself. "If I don't and Slade brings Trigon here everything will be destroyed. Everyone will be destroyed." The knife was shaking slightly in her hand. In her mind she could see all the Titans, her friends. Robin, Starfire, Cyborg, and... Beast Boy. The small, green, hyperactive boy who was always trying to get her to smile. No matter how much he annoyed her, made her angry, or attempted to feed her disgusting tofu she couldn't help but like the changeling. Maybe even like him the way Starfire liked Robin, but that really didn't matter now that she was going to die.

With her resolve printed in her head she closed her eyes and slowly began to push the knife against her throat. Her hand was starting to shake harder and her jaw was set. She could feel her blood oozing down her throat. Just as she was about to push the knife with all her strength something grabbed her hands and began pulling the knife away from her. "Raven, no!" Raven opened her eyes to see Beast Boy trying to take away the knife.

"Go away, Beast Boy! I have to do this!" Raven yelled at him, pulling the knife back towards her throat.

"No you don't!" Beast Boy pulled harder but Raven had the knife in a death grip.

"Beast Boy, let go," Raven groaned. They began spinning around, trying to take the knife away from the other, neither taking their hands it. Raven was growing angry and impatient with Beast Boy. "Beast Boy, let go NOW!" Using her telekinesis, she threw Beast Boy across to the other side of the roof. "I have to do this."

"No you don't!" Beast Boy quickly changed into a wolf and ran across to Raven. Dodging objects Raven was throwing at him, he jumped on top of her. Turning back into a human, he reached for the knife again while Raven was trying to kick him off her.

For some reason the situation was making Raven uncomfortable, and not just because Beast Boy was trying to stop her from killing herself. She could feel his muscles on her. They weren't huge like a boxer's, but they weren't tiny like cartoon characters they make fun of on TV. They were just the right size, the normal size for a fifteen year-old boy. And with Beast Boy's right hand he was holding down her left hand, the one that wasn't holding a knife. Then there was the fact that he was pressing his cheek against hers as he tried to grab the knife she was holding away from him. Oh and she could feel Beast Boy's breath against her ear. It was warm and sent shivers, shivers that she wasn't sure if she liked or not, down her spine. Was it weird that she was noticing all of this while she was trying to stop someone from trying to stop them from killing herself? She wasn't sure.

Focusing back on the knife, she kicked Beast Boy in the gut. He flew off her onto his back. She could hear him groaning from the pain and took this as a chance to use the knife. She closed he eyes and chuckled mentally as she swung the knife towards her neck. To think the one who would bring death to everyone was bringing it to herself.

"Stop!" Raven felt something wrap around her. She opened her eyes and there was Beast Boy hugging her. She stopped the knife before it sliced off his head but she still felt the knife cut his skin.

Raven became angry. "Beast Boy-"

"Shut up!" he yelled in her ear. Raven couldn't help but feel stunned for a moment. Beast Boy never yelled at her even if she deserved it and he got angry at her. "Why are you doing this?" he asked still yelling. "Why?"

"Because I have to," Raven replied calmly. Her calm voice only seemed to make Beast Boy more infuriated.

"Stop saying that! Explain why you are trying to kill yourself! Now!" he barked.

"Because it's the only way to stop Trigon from coming!" Raven yelled back just as fiercely as Beast Boy. "It's the only way, so go away and let me die!"

"This isn't the only way! The Teen Titans are going to stop him!" Beast Boy growled before more softly saying, "We're going to stop him together, remember?"

"I told you we can't! You can't do anything about it!" She tried pushing him away but he wouldn't budge. She could feel herself braking. "If I don't die the rest of you will."

Beast Boy pulled back a little, still holding her, so he could look Raven in the eye. Raven could see all the emotions he was feeling right now in his green eyes. Worry, anger, and sadness but also determination. Determination to stop her, perhaps? Raven didn't have anymore time to think about because Beast Boy spoke up.

"What do you think will happen if you die?" he asked, glaring at Raven.

"The world will be saved," Raven answered, choosing not to tell Beast Boy that this plan only had a fifty-fifty chance of working, "and you guys will be alive. You guys will be happy that the world and everyone in it is safe."

Beast Boy laughed wryly. "You're a selfish idiot."

"What?" she glared at him.

"I said you're a selfish idiot!" he started yelling again. "We wouldn't be happy that you're dead! What would we do without you?"

"You wouldn't change! The team would still be the same!"

"It's not a team if we're missing someone," he snarled. "You're our friend. Why would we want you dead? We'd miss you, Raven, we'd be depressed."

"Shut up," Raven said. She could feel tears running down her face. She was saving them all. Why couldn't he see that? Was he trying to make her feel guilty by telling her the team would go into a depressed state? Heroes don't do depressed. If they're depressed they can't stop crime. Heroes have to do anything to save the world and sacrificing yourself would be something you would do if the situation called for it which hers did. Why couldn't Beast Boy just let her be a hero?

"Heroes have to do anything to save the world you know that."

"What kind of hero makes their friends sad?" Beast Boy snapped, glaring at her with eyes full of anger. "What kind of hero will make them cry? What kind of hero will make them lose a friend?"

"Just shut up!" Raven was crying hard now. She could hear light posts, cars, and other things breaking in the city because of her losing control of her emotions.

"Are you going to make us go through that, Raven?" Beast Boy asked softly after seeing her tears. "Are you going to make me go through that?"

"I don't want to hurt anybody. I just want to stop my father from hurting you all."

"That's why we're brainstorming ideas to make sure he's the only one getting hurt," Beast Boy said, grinning a bit. Raven began to cry harder. "R-Raven, are you alright?"

"I'm fine," Raven assured Beast Boy, smiling. Just happy I have you guys as friends." Raven then cried on his shoulder for a few minutes, during that time Beast Boy tried to take away the knife again, and this time she let him.

When she was done crying she and Beast Boy began walking back into the tower. Beast Boy was leading her to the health room so they could clean and heal their cuts when Raven spoke up. "Beast Boy." Said boy turned to Raven. Acting on an impulse, Raven kissed Beast Boy on the cheek then continued walking. Beast Boy stopped walking and touched where she had kissed him, blushing more red than a tomato. Grinning like he had just won five mopeds, he ran to catch up to Raven.